Your marriage might have been going badly for some time, but settling on something as final as divorce might have thrown your family into a different kind of disarray. Maintaining some normalcy with children and extended family is necessary, but not simple. How can civility be maintained?
1-Get Mental Support
Handling children, a spouse and other responsibilities can be stressing when everything is going fine. When a divorce plays out, stress can almost get to the point of becoming unbearable. For that reason, mental support--in the form of therapy--is essential. Being able to discuss and examine issues with a trained professional's help can feel both freeing and comforting. Your therapist will encourage you to cope with healthy techniques that they'll teach you. They can remind you of the importance of self-care and provide feedback about your thoughts and actions. With their assistance, you may feel like you're a stronger person, which will allow you to govern your children and maintain family activities and routines.
2-Get Emotional Support
Other divorced parents can both understand and advise you about your current situation. Support groups can offer guidance about dealing with the person you're divorcing and parenting issues that are coming up now. When you're exhausted or don't know how you can take things another day, being able to lean on the encouragement and support other parents provide is a relief. If you can't get away from the kids, online support forums and chat groups are available. Check in as much as you're able.
3-Set Ground Rules
If you or your spouse have moved out, the children will likely have questions. You have to agree on some ground rules about visitation, but more importantly you must agree on what message will be sent to the kids. For example, you might agree that neither parent should say negative things about the other when they're alone with the children. You might agree on specific language to describe your divorce and reaffirm that the kids will still remain close with both of you. This can relieve some of the strain you're all experiencing.
If this proves harder than expected, you might need to involve your divorce attorney for legal steps that are possible. Reach out to a law firm like Madison Law Firm PLLC for more help.
4-Tell Teachers and Others
While you might still be embarrassed about your divorce, the teachers, coaches and other adults in your child's life may need to be told about what's happening. They may have ideas for helping the kids cope, and if they see signals that your children are having difficulty, you can work together to make adjustments.
With these basic maintenance recommendations, your family can survive your divorce. As you work with your lawyer to bring proceedings to an amicable close, work on these other issues too.